i whisper “the fvck” to myself at least 20 times a day LMAO.

Ugh, *hotdogs.* Why are they like this? I don’t get why they’re considered a real food. I swear, they’re just mystery tubes of *who even knows what,* and somehow we’re all supposed to be okay with it? It's like someone thought, “Hey, let’s grind up the weirdest leftover meat parts and stuff them into a casing and pretend it’s a delicacy!” Also, let’s talk about that *texture.* It’s too squishy and weirdly smooth. Is it a meat product or a marshmallow in disguise? And don't get me started on the taste! It's like salt-flavored plastic with a hint of “maybe meat.” And then, the way hotdogs are *served.* Have you ever seen someone gracefully eating a hotdog? No, because it’s impossible! You either look like a seagull trying to swallow a fish whole, or you’re awkwardly nibbling it because you’re trying to keep it cute. And let's not ignore that questionable snap when you bite in. Why does it sound like that? There’s no food that should make that noise! 🙅‍♀️ And the toppings. Oh my god. There's mustard vs. ketchup wars over here like this is some serious culinary decision. Is it gourmet, or is it chaos? Also, some people put *relish* on it, like we aren’t suffering enough already? Honestly, hotdogs just seem like a prank.